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A couple of years ago, a former boyfriend became obsessed with this glossy mag I grew to hate -and probably have blocked Swingers looking casual porno dating search engine the name of (help, anyone?). I hated it because it became apparent that the editors of this magazine had a viewpoint that, since then, Ive come to recognize in mainstream society at large. The viewpoint: that getting and maintaining a boyfriend is the ultimate goal of every -'s life. And that if you don't have one, or are not looking for one, or preparing for one, you are somehow misguided, broken, or just plain useless. This, to me, feels like ladies in Victorian England being groomed to be good wives -it's revolting. The constant quest, the conveyor belt of ex-boyfriends, the dating tips, the relationship drama, the "working on it" ethos that stifles independent lives, creativity, freedom in the name of some generic profoundity, some "-" concept that is fuzzy, and -let's face it- kind of a fantasy. I think all those things are great for straight people -they have breeding and rearing to think of. They do not, and should not, be perceived as mandatory for those of us who have already chosen to flaunt the Big Rule ("- goes in pussy"). Is this evolution, or avoidance? Thoughts?

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